Words Spoken in Season

Have you ever vulnerably poured your heart out to someone only to be met with judgment? Where you had expected understanding, you were instead met with a cold rebuke? Sometimes we can speak truth, but if it isn’t spoken in love and in season, we can hurt more than we can help. 

Her words cut like a knife.  Instead of giving me a moment of understanding and even the hug that I felt I needed, I was instead met with a sharp rebuke. At the time, I was reeling from some unsettling news, when someone I thought was a friend scolded me with a scripture verse and then abruptly left the conversation. Where I had expressed feelings of anxiety and concern over a situation, I was met with judgment. 

I left the conversation in tears to later settle into a place of anger. I was not only hurt, but felt wronged. I wanted to lash out and rejoin the conversation with a comeback to defend myself. Honestly, I wanted to tell them how wrong they had been to rebuke me at such a time with a scripture verse of my own. 

As I poured my heart out to God in prayer, I found the solace my heart needed. He gently soothed my wounded heart and also gave me peace where I had been feeling anxious and worried. My Heavenly Father knew exactly how to give my heart the hug it needed by inviting me into His presence. It was a beautiful reminder that I can be quick to seek my solace outside of the loving arms of Jesus and that no one else can truly comfort my heart like He can. 

As I settled into His word, He led me gently away from the scriptures I had hand-picked to take down my enemy in battle to a verse that brought me to a place I could meet my friend with humility and grace. As He ministered to my soul, I found myself dropping my stone and bowing my knees in prayer for the very one I felt had wronged me. 

God turned a painful conversation into a much-needed lesson in humility.

He never intends for us to wound each other using His words, but to use them to fight sin. He never intends for us to use His words to even the score, but to use them to minister to hurting hearts. His word is never to be used to tear each other down, but to lift each other lovingly. 

Though God sometimes leads us to rebuke sin, we are to obey the verse of Galatians 6:1 (ESV), “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.” 

As I prayed for my friend, God changed my perspective. How quickly I can assume I know the best words to use in a conversation and be wrong, too.  It was a lesson to allow all my conversations to flow from a place of prayer, first seeking words in a proper context and then speaking them in His timing. How can I truly be God’s hands and feet without first seeking His heart? 

Let us pause long enough to feel what another feels before we give advice. And before taking up a weapon to wound, be as quick to drop it to seek peace instead. Let us seek to speak words in season and minister in love. 

Do you pause before offering advice, first praying for God to help you see the person in front of you as He does? May we all seek the Great Healer to season our words with grace and humble us to feel the need before we seek to minister to the need. Let us be as swift to seek the heart of God as we are to be the hands of God.